Overview: Using authentic encouragement and appreciation to empower staff, create and maintain a positive environment, and increase job satisfaction for your staff.
My takeaway, ‘aha’ moments from this book:
- Most people’s job satisfaction is tied more to feeling appreciated and valued than it is to pay or tangible rewards.
- Appreciation is focused on the staff member’s value as a person, this is much more powerful than recognition which is focused on rewarding behavior.
- Appreciation needs to be specific to the individual.
- Everyone has preferred ways of having appreciation communicated to them through which expressed appreciation is most meaningful to that individual.
- What is meaningful to me may not be meaningful to another person. If I try to communicate my appreciation to them in the method that works best for me, but isn’t best for them, I may be missing the mark. This is both unhelpful for that person, and a misuse of me as a resource. I should be communicating appreciation with my staff through the method that is most meaningful for them so that it is impactful to them. After all, that is the purpose for which the communicated appreciation is intended.
- Researchers found employee engagement to be directly related to their workplace appreciation.
- Interestingly, there was a correlation found between happiness and coworkers, more so than with happiness and supervisors (23% higher with coworkers). (pp. 49-50)
- Supervisors should lead by example and model appreciation and encouragement.
- Some things are ‘caught not taught.’
- Staff act like their supervisors. We create the norms they will mimic and follow.
- For those who have never been taught how to be encouraging or show appreciation, our example will provide the foundation for what it looks like. This will result in staff being able to reflect those same behaviors with their coworkers, positively impacting the work environment.
- There is a ripple effect that takes place when supervisors model this type of positive behavior. Parallel to servant leadership replicability.
- Verbal praise creates positive reinforcement – the more you praise a specific behavior, the more of that behavior you are likely to receive.
- Affirming character is important, but can be more difficult than affirming behavior.
- Character is what you do when nobody is watching.
- Affirming character is affirming the individual for their worth as a person more than as an asset to the company.
- Quality time as a preferred method of being appreciated does not automatically translate into quality time with the boss – it could be quality time with coworkers instead of with the boss.
- A key to quality time is personal attention.
- Idea: on a regular basis throughout the year, have small group listening sessions where staff can share ideas for how to make the company better. Then implement what is reasonable and valuable. This communicates to staff that their voice, opinions, and ideas are valued. It will backfire if good ideas aren’t accepted and implement.
- When tangible gifts are valued, it’s less because of monetary value and more because it was specific and thoughtful.
- When someone gives me a gift because they saw it and thought of me I feel special. This is when the thought truly does count.
- The middle 50% of staff are the steady group who aren’t stars, but whose contribution greatly increases the success of the company. Yet, they are the most likely to not hear encouragement or appreciation, making them the most likely to leave and seek other employment.
- Research showed that 79% of employees who quit their jobs voluntarily claimed a dominant factor in the decision was not feeling appreciated. (p. 135)
- If you find yourself concluding that you have staff who will not be satisfied by anything you do to make them feel valued – perhaps you are not communicating in the language of appreciation that is actually meaningful to them. Perhaps it is me as a leader who is failing in my communication. Perhaps they are not being ungrateful and impossible to make happy. Perhaps my attempts to convey value are not being received because I am using a method that is meaningless to them.
- Ouch. This is a humbling thought. I have 2 staff members that I have often been frustrated with because I feel like I just can’t make them happy despite everything I’ve tried. It’s not their fault if I am missing the mark because I haven’t intentionally learned how I should be communicating my appreciation with them.
- Schedule times for communication and encouragement.
- Feedback needs to happen in a timely manner or it loses its effectiveness.
- When you aren’t sure where to start with these concepts – start somewhere with someone. (p. 176)
- “People will do almost anything for you because they know you care about them personally.” P. 185
- The power of influencing through appreciation comes over time – it is the result of small but consistent touch points.
- Many priorities in life are not immediately urgent, and when they become urgent they are enormously so and may be beyond the point of no return.
- The book uses the illustration of taking vitamins and antibiotics. One dose does not avoid or solve an issue. They work in small doses over time.
- Idea: the book mentions making a group chart that shows employee’s primary, secondary, and least important appreciation language – and adding to that chart specific ideas that are most meaningful to each person within those languages.
- Knowing you encouraged someone is enjoyable and can create synergy for you – imagine what it could do for the work environment if staff started catching this example and doing it for each other. Imagine the powerful impact that your work environment could have on your staff if you start modeling showing meaningful and specific appreciation and your staff join in and start doing it for each other. What a wonderful environment that would be to walk into every day. I want this for my staff. It starts with me.
