By Dr. Amanda McElroy
Social media strikes again. A notification pops up on my phone: someone who cares is warning me that my company is being slandered on social media. My heart drops a little in my chest. My staff and I are intentional about striving to treat everyone excellently. My mind goes to “what now?” It seems that despite our efforts to be kind, to provide quality service, to clearly communicate, and to be consistent in enforcing policies for both staff and clients, when individuals don’t get their way, they feel the need to tell the world that we are horrible and don’t care. This accusation couldn’t be farther from the truth. I want to get puffed up in righteous indignation. How can someone be so petty as to spread lies because they didn’t agree with a decision? I read through the comments, something I don’t recommend if you can avoid needing to do so and realize that the conversation has extended far beyond complaining about us and has reached the level of becoming a battle cry to force some of my staff and myself to be fired and for the organization to be shut down. Such an extreme reaction to someone not getting their way, it boggles the mind that people feel this behavior is justified. I don’t know how I should feel about what I’m reading: I want to defend my staff and I want to attack the naysayers for their ludicrous behavior. A still small voice in my heart makes me pause. I turn it off and walk away, needing to clear my head and find the correct perspective on the situation.
Harder than realizing that a temper tantrum could gain such momentum, is learning that people are willing to believe the gossip with no verification or evidence. Even worse, people with no association to my business, to clients, or to staff acted on the gossip they read. They called the local news stations and pushed them to write a story, they harassed former and current staff over the phone and in person out in public, and they made reports to the state of our alleged negligence in hopes the state would force us to close. The reactions, to me, are bizarre!
There is a story in Acts 16 of Paul and Silas finding themselves on the receiving end of the same treatment – disgruntled people throwing as big of a fit as possible, to create the most damage achievable, because they didn’t get their way. Paul and Silas were being followed by a demon-possessed young lady as they went to pray. The young lady, because of the demon possession, made her masters money through fortune telling. Paul commanded the demon to come out of her, and it did! What a wonderful change for her life, to no longer be demon-possessed. Her masters were not happy. Their means of making money through her left with the demon. They didn’t want to do right by her. They didn’t want to treat her better. They weren’t interested in personal or spiritual growth for themselves or for her. They were only interested in greed: in using her to make them great amounts of money. When they realized their money-making-means was no longer an available option, they threw a fit. They did not just complain about what Paul and Silas had done and how it affected them, they did everything in their power to hurt Paul and Silas. The consequences of this fit of slander were very serious for Paul and Silas. Just as people acted against my organization and individuals associated with it based on unfounded slander, people took action against Paul and Silas. The consequences for Paul and Silas were physical: the people of the town started a mob, captured them, beat them, and put them in prison.
Perhaps I can learn what perspective to have for my situation from Paul and Silas. After they were beaten and put in jail, they didn’t whine and complain about how unfair and bizarre the town’s reaction was to their decision to help a young lady. They didn’t stand on a soapbox and preach to the crowd about how foolish they were being. They didn’t attempt to retaliate. The Bible doesn’t say that they tried to run, hide, or fight back. What the Bible does record, is their reaction after being put in prison: Acts 16: 25 says, “And at midnight Paul and Silas prayed, and sang praises unto God: and the prisoners heard them.” How did Paul and Silas react? They prayed and they sang praise to the Lord. And God acted on their behalf. The next verse described an earthquake suddenly happening that was so great it shook the foundation of the prison and caused the doors to open and their shackles to fall off!
Dealing with slander is difficult. If we follow the Bible example, the correct response is not to defend, not to attack, but to go to the Lord in prayer, and to sing His praise.
The story of Paul and Silas’s situation doesn’t end with being thrown in prison. Because of their reaction to the situation, the keeper of the prison and all his family accepted Christ as their Savior! Having the correct response to their difficult situation, going to the Lord in prayer and praise instead of responding, allowed the Lord to work through the situation and through them to influence other people.
Difficult situations are going to happen, especially if we are striving to serve the Lord with our lives and leadership. We can choose to respond like Paul and Silas so that the Lord can be glorified. We can turn to the Lord in prayer, and we can sing songs that worship Him – not just listen to worshipful music, but actually sing to Him. Listening to worshipful music is good, but it leaves room for thoughts and inner dialogue. When we sing, we cannot internally obsess, over-think, and have phantom conversations. It is important to fill our hearts with worshipful music in our daily lives. And when we are facing a difficult situation, it is important that we also sing our praise to our Savior, keeping our minds and hearts focused on Him.
It’s so hard to set aside the mental obsessiveness that comes with difficult situations. I don’t know about you, but I find myself having conversations with people while driving, in the shower, and anytime my mind isn’t otherwise occupied. I know I’ll never have the conversation for real, I know it’s not healthy and is only poisoning my attitude and mood, but I can’t seem to help myself. If I let it go very far at all, I can feel my ego taking over and I start to become an angry person. Not good. Paul and Silas set a beautiful example of how to handle difficult situations. Thus far, I have never had a mob take me, beat me, and put me in jail. If Paul and Silas, having been handled with such cruelty, can set their ego aside and respond with prayer and praise, I feel that I have no excuse for not doing my very best to follow their example. I hope that when I am facing difficult situations, I will choose prayer and praise.
“O sing unto the Lord a new song: sing unto the Lord, all the earth. Sing unto the Lord, bless his name; shew forth his salvation from day to day. Declare his glory among the heather, his wonders among all people. For the Lord is great, and greatly to be praised: he is to be feared above all gods. For all the gods of the nations are idols: but the Lord made the heavens.” Psalm 96:1-5
